New windowless planes

I am just a couple of payments away from paying off my private jet, so imagine how annoyed I am that some new planes are set to make mine look like the Amish knocked it up. (Apologies to all my Amish readers – feel free to email your complaints.)

The idea the plane boffins have had is to get rid of all the windows and turn the walls into massive screens. This has the benefit of reducing weight (apparently) and making the whole fuselage more structurally sound. Another big benefit is that it looks fucking awesome. Essentially, cameras will film the outside and then project the images on the inside.

People may argue that this might make the metal tube you are in more claustrophobic, but I disagree. Firstly, those windows you get now are crap and unless you have a window seat, you don’t see much anyway. Secondly, we are barely more evolved than monkeys (albeit monkeys that can make shit hot aircraft screens) and our eyes are limited. They could replace the windows with hi-def 3d TV screens now and we wouldn’t notice. I think this will make the trip much more pleasant. In fact, it could be mega exciting. If I had my choice we would be on an alien planet or in space. Like this: